


I'm just a sucker for pain

by Miyukitty



Category: Fire Emblem: If | Fire Emblem: Fates
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Tattoo Parlor, Bad Flirting, Bets & Wagers, Canon Bisexual Character, Dirty Jokes, First Meetings, Fluff and Humor, Getting Together, M/M, Protective Siblings, Sexual Humor, i can't write awakening trio without dick jokes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-14
Updated: 2017-01-14
Packaged: 2018-09-17 10:22:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,543
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9319451
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Miyukitty/pseuds/Miyukitty
Summary: Niles is the owner of a tattoo and piercing parlor. He's single, has a cat, and spends all his time at work because Odin, Laslow, and Selena are his ridiculous employees. Just another Tuesday for li'l Niles...





	

**Author's Note:**

> For [Leoniles week](https://leonilesweek2017.tumblr.com/), although it got long enough to be its own fic so it's not in the [drabble collection](http://archiveofourown.org/works/9255563/chapters/20981405). :,) I don't usually do modern AU but this turned out to be a lot of fun! ~~I hope at least someone gets a laugh out of these terrible jokes. niles is a filthy pervert.~~

 

 

Niles frowned at the schedule illuminated on the computer screen. His inking appointment for this morning had rescheduled at the last minute, but his airheaded receptionist had been too busy flirting with the woman over the phone to bother giving him the memo before he came in. Damn that Odin for talking him into giving his boyfriend the job in the first place.

 

Sure, Laslow was a natural at chatting up potential customers and getting them to relax, but that was also the problem: the man didn't know when to shut up. He supposed he shouldn't be surprised, though, given that he'd grown up alongside Odin of all people – the only guy in the world who talked more than him. (And apparently was so desensitized to the flirting that he never chastised Laslow for it.)

 

Niles sipped his coffee and deliberated whether he should just go home and play with his cat until he was needed later in the afternoon. He could hear both of the guys laughing boisterously at the front desk, and then Selena's exasperated sigh at their antics. Niles grinned despite himself, and meandered out into the lobby of his parlor to see if there was anything he could amuse himself with for a few hours. They were offering a sale on piercings today, so they were expecting a rush of college kids eager to try out their credit cards and get a few new holes.

 

It was going to be a good day.

 

* * *

 

Sure enough, by noon the parlor was bustling. Selena herded walk-ins one by one to the back room for piercings, Odin sat behind the desk with his headphones on, sketching sleeve designs for a new client, and Laslow fielded calls in between selling aftercare kits and lavishing compliments on everyone that wandered through the door.

 

Niles was doing wrist stretches to limber up for his appointment later when the pair of well-dressed blondes stepped up to the counter. Laslow was occupied with the phone, so Niles gave them a once-over while they waited. They looked like twins to him, brother and sister, but they couldn't possibly be more opposite in body language.

 

The sister was smiling brightly and practically vibrating with excitement as she gazed at the photographs of his work hung on the walls. Her long ringlets were styled into Lolita pigtails and streaked with vivid purple dye. She was probably into anime like Odin, Niles guessed. She had the same kind of phone charms as he did. Her brother on the other hand was outright scowling, arms crossed over his nice dress shirt and tie, dark eyes narrowed in skepticism at Niles's business card. He looked vain as hell – he was even wearing a headband like some sort of tiara.

 

If he was being honest, Niles thought they were both pretty cute, but the pouty one was more his type. He waved them both over.

 

"Hi there, I'm Elise!" the girl chirped when she noticed Niles's unabashed stare. "I'm looking into getting my first tattoo. My eighteenth birthday was last week," she clarified proudly.

 

Niles shook her hand warmly. "The pleasure's mine, Elise. I'm Niles, the owner and head artist. Looking forward to working with you."

 

He raised an eyebrow as her stuffy chaperone made a scoffing noise in the back of his throat. "That's presumptuous," he muttered under his breath.

 

  _Ooh, a challenge._

 

"And this is my brother Leo, but you can ignore him because I am an adult capable of making decisions for myself and he has no say in the matter, thank you," Elise said loudly, sticking her tongue out at Leo.

 

"Technically you've only been an adult for about five days," Leo groused. "I'm here to make sure you don't get scammed by these con artists into doing something to your body you're going to regret for the rest of your life."

 

Niles stuck out his tongue at Leo, waggling the barbell pierced through the center. Leo recoiled with a loud noise of disgust, making both Niles and Elise laugh.

 

"Hey, I resent that implication," Niles retorted. "We are a reputable small business with a high customer satisfaction ratio. Read the Yelp reviews. Most of us don't even have criminal records," he teased.

 

"Yeah, don't be rude, Leo," Elise chimed in.

 

Leo brandished the business card as damning evidence in front of their noses. "You're the owner and you named your establishment 'Ink Kink'."

 

Hearing those words rolling off Leo's uncomfortable tongue brought a genuine smile of enjoyment to Niles's face. This was what he lived for. He rested his chin in his palm and batted his eyelashes.

 

"Cute, right? It was either that or 'Pricks'."

 

Leo cast a withering glare in his direction.

 

"You know… because of all the needles," Niles drawled. His hand made a lazy gesture in the air that suggested something larger than a needle.

 

"Right. Let's just sign the papers and get this mistake over with," Leo grumbled.

 

Niles drew up the consent forms and went over safety and costs with both of them. Elise didn't bat an eye at the hourly rates he charged, or the cancellation fee in case she backed out – they were rich kids, like he figured.

 

Then he introduced Elise to Odin, so that the two could go over art ideas. Elise's phone was filled with photos of lilies. Niles suppressed a snicker, knowing how frequently Odin complained about being stuck drawing flowers instead of "cool" things that appealed to his edgy aesthetic, like skulls and monsters. He'd get over it once he told her all about his web comic, though. (He told every customer far too much about his web comic.)

 

Leo just stood awkwardly to one side during their conversation, managing to look both pissed off and worried at the same time. Niles kept an eye on him in case he needed actual reassurance toward Elise's safety, but Leo remained silent and sulky for the rest of their visit, so he let it go without comment.

 

* * *

 

"You're certain about this, Elise? Remember, this is _permanent_ ," Leo pressed urgently.

 

Elise rolled her eyes. "Xander said I could have whatever I wanted as a graduation present, and this is what I picked. I already had to talk him into it, I shouldn't have to convince you too."

 

"He spoils you because you're the youngest. I'm trying to be the voice of reason."

 

Selena elbowed Niles none too gently when the pair of bickering siblings came in through the door. He pretended not to feel her kick his shin, either, before he glanced up. Niles was hardly surprised to see Leo tagging along again the day of Elise's appointment. Elise was skipping – honest-to-god _skipping_ , he couldn't recall the last time he'd seen someone quite so excited to get their first ink – and he was clearly trying to talk her out of it before she handed over her credit card. This was a losing battle if he'd ever seen one.

 

What did surprise Niles was how happy he was to see Leo's sourpuss face again. He might have even looked forward to it. Just to get another chance to make him squirm a little, of course.

 

In the quiet of the back room, Elise shucked off her blouse and lay face-down on the table as bidden. Niles carefully applied the stencil between her scapula. Kudos to Odin, the design looked fantastic – Elise had chosen four specific flowers to weave around the lily at the center, and Odin's signature bright colors and bold line weight made it flashy and attention-grabbing, something he felt suited Elise's big personality.

 

Leo hovered anxiously over Niles's shoulder to make sure it wasn't off-center.

 

"And you're really sure? You're trusting this stranger to operate dangerous machinery with his lack of depth perception?" Leo sniped.

 

Elise flung her shoe at her brother. "I'm gonna kick you out if you can't play nice, Leo!"

 

"Yeah, _Leo_ , whatever are you implying? I didn't say anything about that stick up your ass." Niles turned slowly, crooked smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth.

 

"It is a perfectly valid criticism. Don't make me out to be a bad guy when you are a tattoo artist who is _missing an eye_ ," Leo gritted through his teeth. "If you're sensitive to criticism, you might consider a profession that relies less on vision."

 

"Ah, I love it when you get all feisty. Don't worry, I know one kind of job I can perform with my eye closed," Niles leered.

 

The second shoe whacked Niles over the head.

 

"Both of you, get along!" Elise ordered. "I don't have all day to listen to you two bicker. I'm paying by the hour, so get on with it!"

 

A beat passed, and then Niles chuckled and readied his equipment. Leo shot him a frosty glare but finally sat in the corner.

 

The familiar buzz of the machine filled the room as Niles began his outline. Elise had a surprisingly high tolerance to the needle. She handled the pain well for a first-timer, barely fidgeting at all. Leo, on the other hand, was even paler than usual. He was pretending to read a book on competitive rose growing, despite not having turned a page for the last ten minutes. Niles stifled a snicker at the constipated face he was making.

 

Elise soon grew bored of the games on her phone, and settled on making conversation as a distraction.

 

"So did you do that yourself? Your tongue ring?" Elise questioned.

 

"No, that's a leftover from my wild youth. I've mellowed out in my old age," Niles grinned. His calloused hands moved with steady confidence as he chatted. "Selena only gives us piercings when we lose bets to her. She loves making Laslow cry – ask to see his nipple rings some time, they turned out quite lovely," he added.

 

Elise giggled, ears turning pink. "What about Odin?" She asked eagerly.

 

Niles laughed. "Ohh yeah, she got him good last year. He said, and I quote, 'do your worst, my body is a canvas that can only be improved upon! I do not fear your mortal design,' yadda yadda, anyway she decided to take him up on the challenge."

 

Elise tilted her head closer, dropping her voice to a conspirator's whisper. "Yeah? What did she do to him?"

 

"Ever heard of a Prince Albert?"

 

Leo stood abruptly, chair scraping the floor. "That's enough filth out of you, Niles," he snapped, slamming his book shut. His cheeks were tinged red.

 

Niles chuckled knowingly as he finished the last petal detail. Rich boy Leo wasn't as sheltered as he looked. He powered down and carefully placed the machine on the table.

 

"Time to take a break," he smiled down at Elise, making it a point to ignore Leo. He patted her back with a towel, wicking away the small beads of blood that had broken the skin. "We're done with the black lines, so I have to mix the colors. You can stretch your legs, use the restroom, whatever. Ask Laslow at the front desk if you need a glass of water."

 

She bounced off with her phone in hand, all smiles. Leo lingered in the room for a moment longer, like he wanted to say something but didn't quite want to start the conversation.

 

Niles quirked an eyebrow, but pretended to be busy with the machine. Awkward silences were amusing to him. Was it a question hovering around his lips? Would he ever spit it out? Or did he prefer to swallow?

 

Leo rose and cleared his throat, book tucked under one arm. Then both of them noticed the same object on the table. Niles burst into raucous, braying laughter, as Leo blanched and bolted from the room.

 

"Elise! Elise, you forgot to put your shirt on!"

 

* * *

 

 

Niles took a long, messy swig from his water bottle, letting it drip down his chin. He never realized how much work drained him until the piece was complete. He watched Laslow draw up the final bill at the register, his amiable receptionist wreathed in smiles. Elise was still bouncing in place, but this time she was trying unsuccessfully to take a photograph of her own back.

 

"Remember to keep it clean these next few days while it's healing, and don't pick at it," Laslow informed her. "You're the very image of loveliness, Elise, and those beautiful flowers will suit you perfectly."

 

Nearby Selena made a loud gagging noise and pretended to vomit behind the counter. Odin slapped her on the back and burst out laughing.

 

"Here, you take the pic," Elise demanded, shoving her phone into Laslow's hands. He fumbled and nearly dropped it, blushing at his own expense.

 

Niles glanced up from his drink when Leo cleared his throat, and quirked an eyebrow. Leo's posture was rigid, arms awkwardly at his sides like he wasn't sure how to present himself. Niles tilted his head, and found he was unable to resist riling him when Leo looked serious like this.

 

"Any last chastisements, oh overprotective brother? Do I deserve to be punished for anything today?" Niles teased.

 

Leo's cheeks tinged pink, lips twisted in a petty moue. Damn, he really was cute.

 

"That's-! Ahem. That's what I wanted to talk to you about, actually."

 

"Hmm? Do go on," Niles drawled. He made a show of slouching against the wall and winking, the very opposite of Leo's stiff stance. Winking was never as effective with only one eye, though, Niles lamented.

 

Leo huffed, unwilling to break polite eye contact no matter how ruffled he got.

 

"Niles, you were professional today in spite of your coarse language. My childish outbursts were uncalled for. I thought it fitting to offer you an apology, seeing as you have made Elise very happy. I'm not usually so close-minded. I may have judged you unfairly in my haste to protect my sister."

 

Niles whistled lowly. He hadn't expected such a thorough and honest apology from Leo. Maybe he wasn't as stuck up as he looked. There really wasn't anything to apologize for, in Niles's book.

 

"Don't worry about it," he shrugged. "Your sister's a sweetheart, and I had fun talking to you. If you ever feel the need to get some new holes, I hope you'll consider me to fill them."

 

Leo's blush worsened, and he mumbled something under his breath. Before Niles could make him repeat it, Elise tackled her brother from behind and jammed her phone under his nose.

 

"Look, it's Camilla! She says Corrin got on an earlier flight! We gotta get back to the shop now if we wanna make it to the airport in time!"

 

"Shit," Leo blurted. "I mean – Corrin's really coming home early? We have to go immediately!"

 

He was halfway to the door when he turned back to Niles. There was something apologetic and almost longing written in Leo's expression, as he bit his lip.

 

"I wasn't finished-" he started, but Niles waved him off.

 

"Go on, you're all done here. Thanks for your patronage," Niles smiled thinly.

 

Leo looked pained for a moment, but Elise's grip on his elbow did not afford him the time to dally. They rushed out the door, and then silence fell over the lobby.

 

Niles stared down at the water bottle in his hands. He was vaguely disappointed, though he wasn't sure what he'd been expecting to happen. Cute customers came and went all the time, and other than angling for a better tip, the flirting didn't really mean anything. After a long moment, Selena sauntered over to him, arms behind her back.

 

"Sooo, what were you two talking about over there in the corner? Did you get his number?" she asked innocently.

 

Niles squinted at her. Behind the desk, Odin and Laslow were trying and failing to look like they weren't eavesdropping.

 

Niles leaned slowly against the counter, eyebrow raised.

 

"I'm not sure who bet on what outcome, but I'd like to know why this was a bet in the first place," he grumbled.

 

"Ha! He totally struck out!" Odin crowed. Laslow high fived him, beaming, while Selena muttered a few choice curses under her breath.

 

A moment later Odin composed himself and clapped Niles on the shoulder, staring him directly in the eye. "There are a great many fish in this wide ocean we all live in, and. Uhh. Better luck next time, my friend," he added helpfully.

 

Niles brushed his hand off and stalked over to the swivel chair, heaving himself down with a sigh.

 

"You can come out for drinks with us after we close, if you'd like company," Laslow offered thoughtfully as he took a seat in Odin's lap. "Selena's buying."

 

"We could totally hear you two flirting in the back room all the way out here," Selena complained. "And you were looking forward to this appointment all week, we could all tell! You're wearing a new shirt and _aftershave_ today, for shit's sake. Was he seriously not interested? He didn't try to say he was _straight_ , did he. He was wearing a _headband_. Ughh," she groaned, burying her head in her hands.

 

Niles barked a mirthless laugh. "Thanks for the confidence boost, kids, but Leo didn't turn me down. He just took off for whoever Corrin is, so. Oh well."

 

He fell silent, as the trio stared at him.

 

Selena raised her face, a wolfish grin spreading on her features.

 

"Is that so," she sneered, planting her fists on her hips. "That means the bet is still on. I'm not buying you gay losers jack shit until he actually asks the brat out."

 

"No fair," whined Laslow. "I wanted to do body shots off Odin's abs."

 

"You guys are so ridiculous," Niles grumbled halfheartedly. They meant well. "It's not like I have any clue where to find the guy, though. Windmire's a big city. And he has zero reason to come back by himself. It was just a dumb crush, we'll both get over it in a week."

 

"Coward," Selena sneered. "You must really like the guy if you're rolling over this easy. You haven't been on an actual date in ages. Are you just scared?"

 

"You just don't want to lose the bet," Niles pointed out. He was grinning despite himself.

 

"Damn straight! I am _not_ paying for couple's shots," Selena hissed. "I don't have that kind of cash. Boss, you have got to at least _try_. I'll help you track him down. I'll do whatever grunt work you need. C'mon. Help me help you."

 

"Oi, no cheating," Odin protested. "If the fates have decreed their paths shall cross again, Leo shall find Niles all on his own! You don't get to butt in and help them."

 

"Sore loser," Laslow chimed in.

 

"Hey, Odin," Niles called, absently drumming his fingers on his thigh. "Can you email me a copy of Elise's tattoo design?"

 

"Of course, boss," Odin shrugged. He reached toward the front desk keyboard around Laslow on his lap, who did nothing to accommodate him as he typed with difficulty.

 

Selena peered over their shoulders at the flowers. "Did you get an idea of how to find him?"

 

Niles closed his eye and ran a hand through his messy hair.

 

"Let's just call it a hunch," he said after a long moment. At the very least, it was something to amuse himself with for a few hours.

 

* * *

 

It was a quiet afternoon, other than the classical music playing softly in the background, and the steady clipping noise of the shears. The redolent scent of petals hung heavy in the still air within the small shop. It was still too cold outdoors to leave the window open, and it was better for business when customers could be drawn to their favorite perfume, or so he reasoned.

 

Leo's slender fingers worked deftly with the shears as he clipped the thorns from a rose stem. He did not turn when the bell jingled behind him, too focused on the task at hand. They had been contracted for a wedding that weekend, so Leo needed to trim and prep a dozen bouquets of the long stems for guest tables, and then wrap all the matching corsages and boutonnieres for the wedding party, not to mention the bridal bouquet itself–

 

"Is this the florist… 'Chivalrose'?" drawled an amused baritone from the doorway.

 

"That's what it says on the sign," Leo replied testily. "Feel free to walk around and browse. Order forms are on the desk if you need anything delivered within city limits." 

 

He heard footsteps and let himself relax. The man was just here to browse. Unfortunately, he seemed to be wandering closer to Leo.

 

He scowled to himself, still annoyed that Elise had talked him into manning the desk so that she could go out to lunch with Corrin and Camilla. If there was one thing Leo detested, it was dealing with uninformed customers. It didn't help that he'd been rather crabby for the last few days anyway; he kept wrestling with the idea of visiting Ink Kink just to see Niles again, but he would look like such a fool if he showed up expecting anything other than professional courtesy. He missed his chance to ask naturally, and now it would be awkward to try and return alone, wouldn't it? How pathetic would he look, trying to ask the flirty owner if he'd meant any of his teasing.

 

He clipped with more aggression than the poor roses required, as the man hovered nearby.

 

"…I might need something custom," the visitor announced. "I caught Prince Albert inside my receptionist in the break room. What flowers would you recommend as a 'congrats on the sex' bouquet?"

 

"Oh no," Leo blanched. He whipped around, brandishing the shears.

 

"Oh yes," Niles sniggered.

 

"How did you find our shop? I'm certain I never mentioned it. You didn't use Elise's emergency contact information for-"

 

"No, no, that's confidential, I would never," Niles quickly waved it off.

 

Leo was not entirely convinced. His heart was jack-hammering in his chest. Niles heaved a sigh.

 

"Would you accept that I just had a hunch?"

 

He tried winking, but Leo's scowl deepened.

 

"Tell me exactly how you found me or I'll get a restraining order," Leo threatened, crossing his arms.

 

"This isn't how I wanted this conversation to go. I'm not stalking you, I promise," Niles said, dropping his act and holding his hands up disarmingly. To his credit, he looked genuinely contrite. "Before I started my business, I used to work for a bail bondsman. You know, re-arresting the people who skip bail. It wasn't pretty work and I got out once I saved enough money, but I still know a few tricks for tracking people down."

 

Leo stared down his nose. He was mildly surprised rather than repulsed, which seemed to buoy Niles's hopes just a fraction. Leo set down the shears and studied Niles for a moment, noticing that he'd actually put on a dress shirt and slicked back his hair. He was wearing a leather eyepatch, different from the disposable cloth ones he'd sported at work. Outside of the rough atmosphere of the tattoo shop, he looked… presentable.

 

Handsome, even. This was really happening, wasn't it.

 

"You were a… bounty hunter? What sort of tricks do you mean," Leo asked, feigning a casual tone.

 

Niles flashed him a crooked grin.

 

"Curious? There are public records available for small business ownership, if you know where to look. You were reading that book about roses, and Elise picked all those specific flowers to represent her family, didn't she? So I had a hunch about the florist thing, and started looking for the name 'Xander'. That narrowed it down just a little."

 

"Clever," Leo admitted. "Although you were lucky the family business belongs to my brother instead of our father," he added. Niles had put a lot of effort into this, into seeing _him_. He allowed the little flicker of hope to grow, ever so slightly. Was that why he was here?

 

"By the way, which one are you?" Niles asked. "The magnolia, the camellia, the gladiolus, or the white rose?"

 

"Ask Elise," Leo grimaced. How embarrassing. "She wouldn't tell me anything about it. Of course she wanted me to think this was some impulse of hers she'd regret later, just to make me worry over nothing."

 

Niles grinned at his discomfort. "Body art isn't something you regret if you put the time into doing it right. Pity you'd never consider getting a tattoo of your own," he commented.

 

Leo swallowed, eyes darting to one side. "Always so presumptuous," he muttered.

 

Niles laughed with delight, and Leo felt his cheeks heat in response. He rubbed the back of his neck, suddenly self conscious of his own appearance in front of Niles. He'd been in such a rush to get started on that massive wedding order, he wouldn't be surprised if he'd put his work shirt on inside out (again). The smell of roses on him was probably overbearing. His hair was probably a mess, but he couldn't just reach up and fix it _now_. Damn, this was the worst possible timing.

 

Niles leaned against the work table, casually closing the space between them. Leo swallowed, and fought to keep his expression neutral.

 

"I know you've got work to get back to, so I won't keep you all day," Niles admitted.

 

Leo's heart sank. He really did have a lot to do. It just seemed far away at the moment.

 

"Tell me… why did you go through all that trouble to come here, Niles?" he asked softly, hopefully.

 

Niles gave a nervous chuckle, and shoved his hands in his pockets.

 

"Well, I mean. Here goes nothing. I meant it when I said I had fun, the other day. I haven't had a lot of time for fun lately, and... I'm making an ass of myself. You're probably not interested in a guy like me, if you're even into guys at all—"

 

"The shop closes at eight," Leo blurted.

 

Niles blinked slowly, uncomprehending.

 

Leo straightened with authority, and smoothed the wrinkles from his work shirt. His heart was stuttering far too quickly, but he maintained his composure. "I expect you to pick me up promptly at 8:30. Don't be late."

 

Niles's face broke into a sloppy grin, blue eye shining. "Yes, sir," he teased. "And where am I taking you?"

 

"Wherever you'd like to take me," Leo responded.

 

There was a long moment of silence. Niles raised an eyebrow and smirked, but Leo didn't back down. He stared calmly, waiting for the double entendre to sink in.

 

He watched as Niles's expression faltered, and then before his disbelieving eyes, Niles began to blush.

 

Leo felt his own cheeks burning (good lord, it was difficult to say such embarrassing things with a straight face, how did Niles do it?), but busied himself with the rose stems again so he didn't have to face him. He was suddenly grateful that his sisters were out of the shop, so that Elise couldn't tease him for the rest of his days.

 

"Sounds good," Niles finally replied, his voice hoarse. "I'll see you tonight."

 

"Looking forward to it," Leo said, and found that he meant it.

 

**Author's Note:**

> feel free to yell at me on twitter @magepaw :) 
> 
> extras: leo is a university graduate who studied business management. corrin was overseas in an exchange student program before coming home. xander inherited the late garon's considerable debts and started the flower shop to pay them off, and ended up supporting his siblings financially when he became successful. odin's web comic is a medieval fantasy epic about owain dark, and he cosplays his own hero at conventions. laslow and odin have an open relationship with on-again off-again friend-with-benefits selena. niles's cat is named nina. :3 
> 
> my alt idea for this AU was doing leoniles with xanlas, where niles and laslow keep spending all their money on flowers to see which brother will do the delivery ~~and then selena wins bc camilla is the driver~~ , lol. but i like how this turned out. :D


End file.
